kingbowser | 01 - video/action for Goldenrod Rocket Base;

[Those in the Rocket Base are sure to hear some... interesting sounds. Sounds of fists pounding, and of some guy... roaring? Yes, roaring. Seems one of the new recruits is a bit of an oddball.

And it won't be long until Bowser bursts into the hall, fists clenched, his lips pulled back to reveal some gigantic, pointed teeth... highly unnatural for a human. Behind him toddles a Turtwig, who rolls her eyes as she trails behind him. Why did she have to get stuck with a crazy one?]

Graaaah! When I get my hands on the one who did this to me, I'll smash 'em into the ground and take back what's rightfully mine! That Star Rod's gotta be around here somewhere...

[Somebody may want to intervene. This guy's packing a lot of muscle and some pretty huge fists, after all.]

[Later, once he figures out how to use the PokéGear, expect a shot of one very angry man... and also, teeth. Seriously, what's with this dude?]

Listen up, because I'm only gonna say this once! If you're the chump who placed this blasted curse on me, you better step forward now, or you'll be facing the full fury of the Koopa Troop! And as their King, nobody's allowed to make a mockery of me, you hear that?!

It was a gutsy move dragging me outta my castle and separating me from the Star Rod. The fact that you turned me into a fleshy mammal would almost impress me, if it weren't so infuriating! So, if you're smart, you'll step forward, beg for my mercy, and change me back! If not...

[He chuckles.]

Well, have it your way.

Threaded | Top-Level Comments Only

i think i can come up with something awesome but i guess i'll keep that in mind

and yes. stupid chicken kid! he went on about some dumb eggs and a giant chicken and thinks he's a top-notch hero, but come on

what kind of hero runs around dressed like yesterday's dinner?

Grrrrah, it's more like I was taken from it according to everybody else! Taken to this silly world as a silly grunt for some silly team.

Whoever designed those jump suits really needs to get their eyes checked. They can't seriously expect me to wear something that dumb!

Well, they've got a whole lotta nerve stealing from me.

[But maybe it's a teensy bit impressive. Sorta. In a really nasty way.]

But how many others are there, anyway? I get why they'd target somebody as powerful as me, but is there a pattern or something?

Pah, that'd be easy if I had the Star Rod. I'd just wish myself back, and it'd be over and done!

[But that's because the Star Rod is awesome and can do anything.]

So I've heard a million times! That doesn't mean I have to enjoy it.

[Grumblegrumble.]

Probably. There has to be some kind of dark magic behind all this. I should know! I've dabbled in that sorta thing before.

The amount of numbskulls around here continues to amaze me. What next? You'll tell me you've never heard of the Mario Brothers?

Ah! [He pounds his fist in his hand.] That's it, I remember those games! I played 'em when I was a kid!

Isn't that very dangerous though?

Do I look like a pansy to you?

[Toothy grin is go.]

Everybody knows the dangerous stuff is always the most fun to mess with!

Yeah. I'm sure. Bowing is often a thing the wild pokemon do to the truly strong.

[Super sarcastic and just snorts derisively.]

N-No...

B-But my mom says it can hurt you a lot! So, I'm not supposed to...

But you couldn't even remember the awesome villain? Everybody knows I'm the real star!

Well, I've had decades worth of experience with it, and it's never hurt me! Or my Magikoopas.

Even if it's not, they will once I'm through with 'em!

[He'll just have to knock 'em around a bit if necessary. Gwa ha ha ha!]

Wouldn't big claws make it kind of hard to draw, though? It seems like it would be pretty easy to accidentally rip the paper...

Yeah! You'll build the most powerful army in Johto, sir!

If there's anything I can do to help, let me know!

Well personally I favvor the water-types. Unfortunately though the whole place is fairly borin', there ain't really much else to do aside from train an' battle.

Unfortunately, you have little choice. It's required at times.

[Cobra doesn't like the uniforms either.]

Luckily, most of the time you're free to dressss however you please.

gotta admit that a chicken isn't the most impressive animal one can pick to represent themselves
what's wrong with sharks or panthers?

and if you are really that desperate for a bird theme why not go for an eagle or something like that?

That's very impressive. Then, do you maybe know how we could break the curse and go home?

Hey, sorry. I haven't played any in the last five years so...

What, really? But the point of the game is to beat you, so wouldn't that make you the real loser?

Forgive me for asking-but what is the Star Rod, exactly? You brought it up earlier, but I don't believe you explained it.

[MAGICAL WISH-GRANTING DEVICE, HUH...]

Oh my god...this is so cool. Like...holy shit, I never would have expected to meet you here or basically anywhere really.

[Now what are the chances of Mario showing up too? Because holy shit John would pay money to see this.]

[... he has a fair point. Those countless koopas are pretty impressive.]

Oh, I'm sure you can. It will just take time, unless you catch your army at the highest levels possible.

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