kingbowser | 06 - video/text to Rockets;

[The feed begins in pitch blackness before a faint flame flickers on in the background, courtesy of one currently unseen Magmortar. The light shifts throughout the room, showcasing one snarling Swampert, two hissing Ninetales, and a buzzing Venomoth, whom some may find familiar. A Torterra stomps by with a roar and a cackle, slipping past those brainwashed 'mons. There's also a sleeping Salamence curled up in the corner, quite massive. Also likely familiar...

And the camera pans to Bowser with a helmet-wearing Wartortle perched on his shoulder.]

Gwa ha ha ha! I don't know about you chumps, but I had a great Valentine's Day! While you were off panicking in the streets, I got to watch the whole thing unfold. It made news broadcasts! I'd say that's one heck of an accomplishment in just a few short months.

[The Wartortle nods, rubbing his hands together.]

Gwaaarl. Gweheh!

Yeah, you said it, runt! Even that little test run's just a tiny sampling of what my Koopa Crew has to offer! But don't worry, you'll see what I mean soon enough...

[Once he, uh. Comes up with more concrete plans.]

by the way, i got details on that radio tower attack
i was there

didn't catch that many faces, but i did catch one. one who deserves to get smashed into the dirt
sasuke the cinnamon runt

ninja kid, dumb headband
the point is, he was there, and he wasn't alone. it's awfully fishy if ya ask me

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

So non-humans get turned into humans once they show up here...

[Interesting. Maybe that fact is related to why she's a lot weaker here than she originally was...]

Anyway, we're getting off-topic. From one final boss to another, let me give you some advice; don't broadcast your evil schemes over the network. Seriously, it's shit like that that's going to earn you a beatdown.

But where's the fun in keeping everything a secret? Then they might think any run of the mill baddy did it. Plus, I love seeing the sorry looks on their faces when I rile 'em up!

I'm not going to tell you how to do your job, especially since you've been in the business longer than me. Just don't be surprised when a small army of goodie-two shoes come breaking down your door.

They always throw fits, so it's not like I'm not expecting it. In fact, I welcome their stupid attempts at thwarting me! Nobody's succeeded yet.

...you've never heard of Murphy's law, have you?

Dunno who this Murphy chump is, and I sure as heck don't care! Villains don't need laws.

That was a rhetorical question.

[She doesn't care, bro. Sorry.]

Anyway, basically what it means is whatever can happen probably will. Say for instance...oh, I don't know, the Mario Brothers coming in to stomp your face in.

...or cut the bridge you're standing on. Either metaphor works.

Bwa ha ha ha! At least Mario and Luigi would give me a challenge! And even then, they'd have to start from square one, while I'm miles ahead.

Seems like your mind's made up.

[Figures. She does remember him being the stubborn sort, so all she does is shrug.]

Well, have fun then. Feel free to kick puppies and burn villages to your heart's content. Just make sure I'm not around when you do it.

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